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Tame Your Fears by Trying Tiny Tests

Changing Your Thinking Habits
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What if your biggest fears are like monsters in a movie that turn out to be made of paper? They look scary from far away, but when you get up close, they aren’t so strong. The problem is, our brains love to make these paper monsters seem real and powerful. The good news is you don’t have to fight the whole monster at once. You can test your fears with small experiments to see what’s really true.

Think of your worry as a really loud, bossy friend who always thinks the worst is going to happen. This friend might tell you that if you raise your hand in class, everyone will laugh. Or that if you try to make a new friend, they will definitely say no. Your brain, trying to protect you, listens to this bossy friend and makes you feel anxious. But what if that friend is wrong? A small experiment is your chance to find out.

A small experiment is not a big, scary mission. It’s a tiny, safe step to see what actually happens. You don’t jump into the deep end of the pool; you just dip a toe in the water. For example, if you’re nervous about talking to people, your experiment isn’t to give a speech to the whole school. It’s to just say “hi” to one person you know. If you’re afraid of looking silly, your experiment could be to wear one slightly colorful sock, just for you to see. The goal isn’t to be perfect or brave. The goal is to be a detective, gathering clues about your fear.

The most important part happens after your tiny test. You have to look at the results. Did the world end when you said “hello”? Probably not. Did anyone even notice your mismatched sock? Maybe not. This is how you start to teach your brain a new story. You collect proof that the bossy, worried friend in your head isn’t always right. Each small experiment is like a single puzzle piece. On its own, it doesn’t show the whole picture. But when you collect enough of them, you start to see that the world is a lot safer and kinder than your fears told you it was.

This process is all about changing a thinking habit. It’s like training a puppy. You don’t yell at the puppy for having an accident; you gently guide it to the right spot over and over again. You are gently guiding your thoughts. Every time you try a small test and survive, you are showing your brain that it can handle more than it thinks. The fear might not vanish overnight, but it will start to lose its power over you. You are the scientist of your own life, running little tests to discover that you are stronger than your paper monsters.

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Quick Tips

I feel silly doing such tiny things. Will this really make a difference?

It absolutely makes a difference! Think of it like a muscle. You can’t start by lifting heavy weights. You have to start with light ones. Each small experiment is like one rep at the gym for your courage muscle. Every time you do a small, brave thing, you send a message to your brain: “I can handle this.“ Over time, these tiny wins add up. The confidence you build from smiling at a stranger can be the foundation for eventually starting a conversation.

How do I know what small step to take first?

Think about your fear and break it down into the smallest possible piece. If you’re afraid of social situations, your first experiment shouldn’t be going to a huge party. Maybe it’s just making eye contact and smiling at the cashier. If you fear failing, don’t try to build a whole business. Just share a simple idea with a friend. The goal is to pick a step so small that you think, “Okay, I can probably handle that.“ If it still feels too big, break it down into something even smaller.

What is a small experiment, and why is it better than just “facing your fear”?

A small experiment is a tiny, safe step you take to test a worry. Instead of jumping into the deep end and giving a big speech, you might just raise your hand to ask a one-sentence question in a meeting. This works better because it feels manageable. You’re not trying to be brave all at once. You’re just being a detective, gathering a little evidence to see if your fear is really true. It’s like dipping a toe in the water before you swim, which feels a lot less scary.

What if my experiment goes wrong and my fear comes true?

This is a really important question. First, you plan your experiment to be so small that even if it “fails,“ it’s not a disaster. But if it does go differently than you hoped, you don’t fail—you learn. Ask yourself: “Was it as bad as I imagined? Did I survive it? What would I do differently next time?“ Often, you’ll find that the reality wasn’t nearly as terrifying as the fear in your head. The goal isn’t perfection; it’s to collect information and see that you can handle small bumps.

How do I stay motivated to keep doing these experiments?

Don’t just focus on the big, end goal. Celebrate every single tiny win! Tell yourself, “I did it!“ after each experiment, no matter how small. Keep a simple list and check them off; it feels great to see your progress. Also, be kind to yourself. Some days will be easier than others. If you skip an experiment, that’s okay. Just gently try again tomorrow with the same small step or an even easier one. This is a journey of small steps, not a race.